Seattle Criminal Defense Attorney

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Posts made in April, 2012

By on Apr 11, 2012 in Communication, Court, Criminal, Domestic Violence, DUI, Noah Weil, Office, Procedure, Sentencing/Penalties | 0 comments

That’s the number one question I get from clients and potential clients. People who are facing a criminal charge are often in that situation for the first time in their lives and want to know how bad it’s going to get. They don’t care about the process, they just want to know what the final result will be. And they call a lawyer to find out. Well I’ll tell you, I don’t like this question. I understand it, but I don’t like it. Today’s post is about better conversations to have, and why my job isn’t to predict what’s going to happen, but to craft it. Good and Bad Conversations The biggest reason I don’t like the question is because of its passive, defeatist quality. Inquiring how it will all end implies that there’s nothing to be done, the person’s destiny is set in stone, and let’s rip the band-aid off quick, etc.   That’s not how I see someone’s situation. Being charged with a crime is unpleasant and scary, but it’s certainly not a death sentence, or any kind of sentence at all. It’s simply a problem, and problems have solutions.    I hear horror stories from people who have had poor experiences with attorneys. Often these stories involve an air of absolutism from the lawyer that things are in fact pre-determined. Here are a couple examples. Bad conversation: Lawyer: “Why don’t you tell me what happened?” Client: ::Talks about the incident:: Lawyer: Oh, that’s easy. Slam-dunk. You can’t lose, everything’s going to be great. Really bad conversation: Lawyer: “Why don’t you tell me what happened, after you pay me some money?” Client: ::Pays some money, talks about the incident:: Lawyer: “Oh you’re #@%$ed.” There’s a bunch of problems with these. In the first one, the lawyer is setting the bar impossibly high. “You can’t lose” is a falsehood because no attorney knows the future. Anyone who says otherwise cares more about their own wallet than about being your counselor. How could you trust anyone like that? I can tell someone I have a good feeling about a course of action, but I always have a contingency plan if things don’t go well (more on that later). The...

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By on Apr 1, 2012 in Criminal, Funny, Noah Weil, Sentencing/Penalties | 2 comments

Happy beginning of April everyone! This week I’m going to go over some extremely common scenarios, and how you can avoid getting jammed up. I get a call at least once a day about these situations, so read this stuff carefully! Hopefully you can use this information to avoid these seven, very common traps for the unwary. Shall we begin?   1. Common situation: You and your friends are hanging out, shooting the breeze, engaging in some normal, all-American hypnotism; doing practice before the big show that night.  Suddenly your buddy has an idea: “Hey, why don’t we hypnotize Jones here and then publicly display him outside the exhibition hall where we will be putting on our hypnotism show?” Also you’re in Everett. WARNING!! What could go wrong: Everett Municipal Code 9.24 et seq. prohibits the public display of hypnotized people in front of a hypnotism theater. And Everett takes this prohibition seriously, with the scofflaw facing up to $500.00 and six months in jail. It’s possible no one’s ever been found guilty of this crime, since a defendant could make the jury think they’re all chickens. But you can’t be too careful!   2. Common situation: You’re out sailing in Puget Sound when you come across another vessel. Feeling parched, you sail up alongside them and ask if they have any drinking water they can give you. “You didn’t bring anything to drink,” they ask concernedly? “No.” you tell them. “I completely forgot to pack anything to drink.” But this isn’t true! You packed some vodka. DANGER!! What could go wrong: Because you’ve deceptively obtained something of value, you’ve just committed False Pretenses on the High Seas and Other Waters. For your piracy, you could be subject to fines and up to one year in jail. If you had deceived your way into obtaining over $1,000 worth of water your possible prison sentence goes up to five years. No deception on the ocean!   3. Common situation: Baby ducks! Baby ducks for days. You’re the mayor of Edgewood, Washington and you just don’t have time to watch all these baby ducks. Luckily you have a special friend that will take four baby ducks off your hands. Problem solved. CRISIS!!...

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